Apparently, every customer service exec in this country lives by these rules:
1. Customers love choice
Dial 1 for Hindi, 2 for English, 3 for Tamil, 4 for Swahili, and 5 for Morse code. Nothing satisfies a customer than having to hear a long list of options only to find out that the option they want isn’t on the menu.
2. Maximise on-hold time
Customers love being put on hold. And while they're there, Kenny G on infinite loop will have a calming influence. And there's something better too! Why not maximise your campaign reach and play your radio spots to them through the 20-odd minutes they're on hold. What an idea I say!
Customers love being put on hold. And while they're there, Kenny G on infinite loop will have a calming influence. And there's something better too! Why not maximise your campaign reach and play your radio spots to them through the 20-odd minutes they're on hold. What an idea I say!
3. The customer’s name is not important
When you ask for the customer’s name, make sure you write it down. Then dispose of the surname and get down to first name basis. Add a Mr. to the first name for good measure. Now, remove the third letter and replace it with K. Swap around at least two of the vowels, and add a T or F in the middle. If you did not attend high school, feel free to play around with the letters until you come up with something that is 2% similar to the customer’s name.
When you ask for the customer’s name, make sure you write it down. Then dispose of the surname and get down to first name basis. Add a Mr. to the first name for good measure. Now, remove the third letter and replace it with K. Swap around at least two of the vowels, and add a T or F in the middle. If you did not attend high school, feel free to play around with the letters until you come up with something that is 2% similar to the customer’s name.
4. Always ask for something you know the customer won’t have
A great technique for quickly disposing of a caller is to ask them for information that they will never possess, such as their complete 20 digit account number, their white blood cell count, or the colour of their undies three Wednesdays ago. If by some miracle a customer is able to provide you with all the necessary information, replace one of the digits and alert the customer that the information they’re providing is incorrect.
A great technique for quickly disposing of a caller is to ask them for information that they will never possess, such as their complete 20 digit account number, their white blood cell count, or the colour of their undies three Wednesdays ago. If by some miracle a customer is able to provide you with all the necessary information, replace one of the digits and alert the customer that the information they’re providing is incorrect.
5. Never underestimate the joys of outsourcing
Yes, there's a great way to show profits and renew that golf club membership. Outsourcing your tele-marketing requirements is the way to go. And if one vendor doesn't work out, here are a dozen other who will. For half the price. What joy!
Yes, there's a great way to show profits and renew that golf club membership. Outsourcing your tele-marketing requirements is the way to go. And if one vendor doesn't work out, here are a dozen other who will. For half the price. What joy!
6. Offer to be helpful at all times
Even if you haven’t solved the customer’s problem, thank them for calling you and ask if there is anything else you can help with. When customers hear this, they will feel appreciated and will certainly call again to report a problem.
Even if you haven’t solved the customer’s problem, thank them for calling you and ask if there is anything else you can help with. When customers hear this, they will feel appreciated and will certainly call again to report a problem.
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